Beautiful Thursdays

I've gone through several emotions today. I startled awake this morning and it took me a few seconds to figure out where I was; I realized that last night I had fallen asleep on my couch watching The Age of Innocence, a romance film set in 19th century New York. I love old movies, black and white movies, century old movies, whatever, I love them. My first love is history and I think that is what always draws me to the old movies.

Anyway, I decided today to write my friend a letter, who is in Australia right now studying abroad. So I wrote the letter (like 5 times until my hand writing was pretty) and then I went to wal-mart, bought some breast cancer awareness envelopes, and sent it. The picture in the top left signifies how I felt when I woke up. I don't have to go to work or class on Tuesday's and Thursdays so I felt completely free to do whatever I wanted.

Eventually however, as the day wore on, I began feeling a hint of loneliness. Living a lone definitely has its advantages: nobody telling you what to do, no animals (sorry Brittanie, I love Freddy and Onxy but..lol), and I can completely control what takes place in my house. I watch what I want, cook what I want, listen to my music loud or study in silence. But today seemed like a particularly beautiful day to be spending alone. I didn't really have much to do today, Justin left for an out of state foodball game this morning, so I really had no one to talk to or no one to laugh with. Brittanie has class all day, so it was just me.

One disadvantage of living alone is the deafening silence. Every now and again, you see something funny on television or you get home from a good day, and you would like to immediately have someone waiting to listen about it. When I used to live with my sister Brittanie, I would come home and Freddy (her sweet dog) would run up and act like a celebrity walked in. He would jump and whine and go crazy (or what Brittanie and I termed "going bonkers.") Anyway sometimes I miss it, most times I don't, but today...I missed it.

Today wasn't a totally depressing day however; I went and bought some brownies (something I never buy for my house is sweets because, unfortunately, I will eat them all because I'm the only one living here.) For that reason, I don't buy sweets, but today, I rented a movie at wal-mart, bought the brownies, and enjoyed another movie called "New York I love You." If you haven't guessed, I am a hopeless romantic, and probably always will be.

Daily Confession: I felt extremely guilty passing a homeless man today who said he was hungry. I didn't have any cash, but I could have easily gone and got some. I just felt guilty, I always feel guilty about that.